How to book a male or trans escort
Before booking an escort, asking the right questions can help ensure a smooth, respectful, and enjoyable experience for both of you. We’ve listed some questions on this page to help clarify expectations, avoid misunderstandings, and show that you’re a thoughtful and respectful client.
One of the most common questions we get asked about is why an escort is not replying to you. These days we all expect instant answers but the reality is, escorts are not necessarily sitting around waiting for you to contact them the minute you get horny. They might have a regular job, be at uni, or have family commitments. The time you contact them, they might be at the movies, in the shower, asleep, studying, having dinner with friends – just like “regular” folk.
It’s also possible that on the day you message – they are simply not in the mood. And although they should reply to you all the same, some may choose silence over chatting to you.
The key message is planning – booking well in advance should help solve some of those issues.
So, assuming those obstacles are sorted – here is what you should ask or confirm with a male (or trans) escort that has a profile listing on NZ Rent Boys
What services do you offer?
On NZ Rent Boy profile pages, escorts usually list all the services they provide. But sometimes they may not list everything or they may have ticked the wrong box! So either way, you’re best to confirm.
Not all escorts offer the same services. Some specialize in companionship, sensual massage, BDSM, or the “girlfriend/boyfriend experience,” while others may or may not provide sexual services.
Why ask? To make sure you’re both on the same page and avoid disappointment or awkwardness.
What are your rates, and what do they include?
Ask about the cost and what’s covered during your time together. Is it just time-based, or are specific services included?
Be clear about what you want to do because many escorts charge extra for some services – like kinks or fetishes.
Why ask? So you can budget properly and avoid surprises or misunderstandings about money.
Do you require a deposit?
Some escorts ask for a deposit to secure the booking, especially for new clients or longer sessions.
Generally, you should be a little bit cautious about sending money to people you don’t know. But if the escort has good reviews, and you’ve had a good experience chatting to them, it should be OK.
If you’re still nervous, tell the escort that NZ Rent Boys offers a secure deposit system – we will collect the money on behalf of the escort and transfer it to them soon after your booking starts. You’ll need to pay a 10% fee to use this service. So if the deposit is $30, the fee will be $3 (Total to pay is $33).
Why ask about deposits? To show you’re serious, and to know how to handle payments properly and safely.
What’s your cancellation or rescheduling policy?
Life happens — but it’s important to know how the escort handles last-minute changes or no-shows. What will happen if you are late? Or the escort is late?
Why ask? To avoid losing your deposit or damaging the relationship if plans change.
Are there any boundaries or rules I should know about?
Every escort has limits — physical, emotional, or logistical. Ask respectfully about anything that’s off-limits. One thing that is off-limits for everyone is bareback sex. It is against the law in New Zealand for you to ask or for the escort to provide bareback sex. There are large fines for anyone caught breaking this rule.
Why ask? To ensure you don’t cross lines and to make the experience comfortable and consensual for both of you.
How should I prepare for the session?
Some escorts have preferences for how you should show up — freshly showered, sober, clean-shaven, etc.
Why ask? To make sure you’re respecting their time, comfort, and hygiene standards.
Where does the booking take place?
Ask whether the escort offers incalls (you visit them) or outcalls (they come to you), and confirm the location and any additional costs (e.g., travel fees).
Why ask? So you can plan the logistics properly.
How do you prefer to be contacted (and when)?
Some escorts prefer texts, encrypted apps, or emails — and may not respond to calls. Respect their preferences and working hours.
Why ask? So you can communicate respectfully and efficiently.
Are you comfortable with discretion/confidentiality?
If you’re concerned about privacy, it’s okay to ask how the escort handles discretion — though keep it brief and respectful.
Why ask? Many escorts value discretion as much as clients do, and they’ll usually be happy to reassure you.
Is there anything you’d like from me to make our time together more enjoyable?
This shows maturity and emotional intelligence. Some escorts may have preferences about mood, dress, or even music.
Why ask? Because thoughtful clients tend to have the best experiences.
Final Tip: Ask Politely
Be clear and respectful in your tone — never assume or demand. Escorts are professionals, and the best way to have a great experience is to treat them as such.
Asking these questions in advance shows that you’re considerate, responsible, and serious about having a positive, respectful encounter. In return, you’re far more likely to enjoy a truly memorable experience.
This blog post was brought to you by JerkMate
